Staying OUT of the Friend Zone

One of the biggest problems college guys face with women is being put in the “Friend Zone.” I can tell you from experience that being in the zone is terrible for your confidence and feels downright miserable. There’s nothing worse than having the girl you are in love with rejecting you on a daily basis and seeing her with other men.

Once you’re in the friend zone it’s difficult to get out, but not impossible. Getting out requires using jealousy plot lines intertwined with non-neediness and well timed teases. I teach this to my more more advanced students. For everyone else, this article is about NOT getting put into the friend zone.

So you know to stay out of the friend zone…but how? There are two characteristics which differentiate friends from winners - TEASING and TAKING RISKS

TEASING
Let’s talk about teasing. If you’ve read any of my blogs or my book you’ll know that teasing is key to building sexual tension. You need sexual tension to get a girl attracted to you. So let me ask you…why do you think some guys get put in the friend zone? I’ll tell you, the guys failed to establish sexual tension.

Look at it this way - conversations that DO NOT have sexual tension are exactly like your normal conversations between friends, colleagues, and acquaintances. Why SHOULDN’T you be in the friend zone if your conversations with the girl are just like everyone elses??? You need to differentiate yourself from everyone else. You need to be the one that brings the sexual tension into the interaction. Continue to tease and you will reduce your chances of being put in the friends zone.

RISK TAKING
Generally speaking…who’s supposed to make the first move? MEN of course. Both women and men understand that the man is supposed to initiate any major relationship escalation. The first kiss, the first time having sex, the marriage proposal, they are all supposed to be initiated by the man. So how does this relate to the friend zone?

One of the hardest steps to take in an interaction is the first kiss. Most guys look for the PERFECT time for a first kiss. Everything has to line up perfectly. But when you’re thinking about taking that step you’re scared of rejection..your adrenaline is rushing…your mind is running at a thousand miles an hour…you think that if you fail things are going to get awkward..etc..etc…Fear takes over and you freeze. You don’t go for the kiss. You think to yourself that next time will be different.

You’d be surprised how many times a guy gets placed in the friend zone because he fails to act. If you don’t kiss the girl she’s going to think that you DON’T LIKE HER and she’s going to move on to the next guy. She’ll put you on the back burner thinking you just want to be friends with her and continue her search for Mr. Right.

You need to get over yourself and be willing to take a risk. Don’t wait for the perfect moment to kiss her. Create the moment. Take any opportunity you have - even if you’re only alone with her for a minute or two.

I’d much rather be the guy who risked the kiss and failed than be the guy who wonders what would have happened if I tried.

How to use “being in the friend zone” to your advantage…coming soon

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Forever 21…

…is a girl’s clothing store. Inexpensive, stylish gear for a college girls who want to look good in a bad economy.

It’s also the place where yesterday I got three phone numbers and a mini-date. Lately, I like to meet college girls during summer in locations where they’re least likely to have their shield up.

What do I mean by shield? Well, if you’re out with a couple guys at a party and you approach a group of attractive girls, you’ll get shields. I know how to lower these, and I explain how anyone can do it in my college dating guide, but I’d just assume not deal with them. In a girls clothing store, especially one where lots of hot college girls shop, there are no guys and girls aren’t expecting to be hit on, so they have no shields.

I start conversations by standing a few paces away from a girl, and without turning towards her (so I don’t show any interest), I ask, “do you have a good fashion sense?” Right away, I qualify her. College girls are used to getting hit all the time because they’re attractive. I start the conversation by determining if her opinion is worthy before continuing.

If she says yes, then I tell her I’m buying a shirt for my niece, and I ask for her opinion on whatever I’m standing near.

From there, I use the structure I describe in my book to continue the conversation and get her phone number.

BTW..I bought the shirt before going on the minidate because the girl bought something too and I wanted to time our leaving simultaneously so I could suggest we meet for coffee. I just returned the shirt the next day.

Have fun shopping!

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More on Where To Meet College Girls During the Summer

I’m getting lots of emails about meeting girls over the summer. The two most common questions are 1) does everything in my college dating guide still apply and 2) where are the best places to meet college girls on campus during the summer.

The answer is simple and I know from experience. You’ll find it’s easier to meet girls over the summer because girls have less social pressure to be with guys in their peer group.

The best places for you to meet girls are locations where they’re not pre-occupied. You can meet girls who are leaving classes or studying in cafes and libraries. You should screen for her logistics early in the conversation. Maybe she’s only in town for a week or she commutes. You can’t suggest a mini-date or invite her out until you know. For example, “I never saw you at any of my parties last semester. Are you taking summer classes?” or “do you think summer classes are easier or harder? Today at lunch one of my girlfriends said she thinks it’s easier to get an A over the summer.”

Girls who are on campus just for summer classes will be more interested in meeting guys like you because they’re only there for a limited time. It’s the same reason why it’s easier to hookup on spring break. No strings attached.

Summer is the perfect time for you to meet girls. It’s ridiculously easy to do. You only have to read my ebook. Everything else will happen for you.

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Meet Girls At Summer College

Meeting girls at college is easy because they feel safe around people who are in their “community.”

This sense of community is strong at campus schools like JMU, UVA and Cornell. The feeling of community is less at city schools like BU or NYU.

Regardless of what school you go to during the summer, the feeling of community is AMPLIFIED. Students at summer college tend to stick together, have more trust in each other, and build stronger bonds. The university also tends to stick summer students in the same buildings, further building a sense of community. This makes meeting a girlfriend THAT MUCH easier.

In The College Guide To Dating Summer Edition, you’re going to learn how to meet, attract, and date your perfect girl. You’re going to learn how to take the sense of community and use it to your advantage. You’ll get a step-by-step model that is so easy to follow. Student’s from around the country have used the CGTD Summer Edition to make the most of their summer experience. Here’s some of the stuff you’ll learn:

  • How to start a conversation with college girls
  • Where to start a conversation
  • Specific things to say
  • How to get a phone number
  • What to do after you get a phone number. You NEED to get a second date, right?
  • How to use places like class, the quad, the dorm, the library, and the cafeteria to your advantage

You WILL hook up within 7 days of reading the book.

You’ll also get a free e-mail consultation with each book. I’ll personally help you enjoy summer college and make it the best 3 months of your college experience.

For 14.95, or the price of two beers, you’re going to DRAMATICALLY increase your success with women. Spend every weekend with a girl you love hanging out with with and ENJOY college!

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This Week’s Testimonial

Gatsby,

I found out about the guide while performing a google search on meeting sorority girls. I saw someone recommended the dating guide, so I looked it up and after liking what I read, I purchased. I was one of those things where you’re looking for something and while in the process of that, you find something better. I wasn’t expecting to find the guide, but glad I did!

Thanks!

- B.A.P

Send in your review of the College Guide To Dating by e-mailing gatsby@collegeguidetodating.com

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Meeting and Dating Sorority Girls

Sorority girls are a different breed of college women. They have strict social norms that they have to follow. Most sororities, especially the ones with the hot girls, have certain “paired fraternities.” Sorority girls are pressured into dating only the guys in these paired fraternities. To understand this, you need to understand how a greek system is organized.

Like any society, there are certain classes of people. There are the “hot” fraternities/sororities (all the way up the ladder) and the “not so cool” fraternities/sororities (all the way down the ladder). Then there are the ones in the middle. This is just like a caste system. Girls on top of the ladder are pressured into dating the guys at the top of the ladder, otherwise they might be laughed at and their reputation might be damaged. Girls in the middle of the ladder aren’t pressured to date any particular type of guy.  Girls in the bottom of the ladder shouldn’t be dated at all. 

Understanding this psychology will help you tailor your approach. First, let’s talk about what to do if your girl is in the highest social class.

Highest Social Class
The best way to make these girls your girlfriend is to join their “partner” fraternity. Once you’re in their partner fraternity, you will need to use the methods in the College Guide To Dating to attract her and escalate the relationship physically.

The more common case is that you are NOT in their partner frat and you don’t have any intention of joining it.  In this case, use the techniques in the college guide to create a strong bond between with a brother of the partner frat. Your friend will know about the sorority parties your girl will be at, and he will invite you to them. Usually, brother and sister sororities don’t invite “outsiders” to their parties. Just being at the party will communicate to your girl that you ARE worthy of dating, after all you’re on the “inside.’

You’ve accomplished the first big step, you’re on the inside. Most of the time this will be enough to continue with the meet, attract, escalate model in the book. Sometimes you might run into a question along the lines of “so how do you like being in this fraternity.” In this case you have two choices. You can either lie to her or you can tell her the truth. If you want to date her, lying to her will damage your relationship in the long run. Instead, use a line that will make her O.K. with the fact that you’re not in the fraternity. “These guys are my absolute BEST friends. They would do anything for me and I would do anything for them. You know, ever since I was young I knew how important it was to surround yourself with great people. These guys are exactly that. I’m the brother that never even had to pledge cause we are JUST THAT CLOSE (follow up with a qualification question).” *More on qualification in the book. This will communicate to her that you aren’t in the frat but are “IN” and are O.K. to date. 

The Middle Class Sorority
Dating the middle class sorority girl is easier. She has way less social pressure to date a particular type of guy. They do have “partner” fraternities but are not “required” to date them. I still recommend making friends with a brother of the partner frat. This way you will be invited to the sorority parties. These girls are totally approachable in class and randomly during the day or night. Just use the methods we talk about in the book.

In summary, sorority girls are regular girls who sometimes have social norms they need to follow. As long as you know about these norms, you can plan ahead and get on the “inside”. You’ll still need to know how to attract and escalate the relationship so make sure to pick up a copy of The College Guide To Dating!

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Meet Girls During Finals Week

Finals week is here and you’re buckling down to study for exams and get papers written.  Of course everyone else is too, and you’re probably finding that it’s harder to meet college girls on campus now.  It’s tougher to talk to girls and set up a date because they’re too stressed to think about the future.  If you try to talk to girls who are really busy, they’ll be thinking, “What’s this guy’s problem. Doesn’t he see me studying?” or “I can’t deal with this now.”  Girls cope with academic stress differently than guys.

Here’s the thing. After the exam, she’ll be thinking something very different.  In fact, she’ll be feeling something very different.

After you have an intense mental experience such as a final exam, you need to recharge your energy.  Whether it’s with exercising, straightening your room, or meeting up with friends – you have something in particular you like to do.   Evolutionary psychologists believe that primitive humans held celebration rituals as rewards for hard work (i.e. a long day hunting, moving camps, surviving the winter, etc).

What does this have to do with college dating?

Right now, college girls everywhere are taking exams and writing final papers.  Like you, they are going to have to recharge after the experience.  It might be at a party full of drunk college girls, a movie with friends, or lounging in the quad.  Just as you have a way to charge your energy, so does every single college girl.

If you familiarized yourself with the conversational guidance in my book, go talk to college girls today and put that knowledge to use.  Girls will be more receptive than usual because they’ll be recharging their energy after a stressful week.

-Gatsby

P.S.  Hope you had a good semester, my friends.

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The 3 Biggest Mistakes Men Make

Avoid these and become more attractive instantly

Mistake 1: Being Her Therapist

Girls sort guys into four categories:

  • Long term relationship (husband material)
  • Short term relationship (Few weeks, summer flings, one night stands.)
  • Friend / Jokester (The guy she goes to when she wants to be entertained)
  • Therapist (The guy she goes to when she is having a bad day)

By being a therapist, listening to her problems, and trying to “comfort her”, you fall into the “therapist” class. Now I’m not saying that you shouldn’t listen to her, but there are certain topics that shouldn’t be talked about. Ex-boyfriends and the time that you got beat up by your little sister (DLV) are two of them. Many guys play the therapist cards but don’t play their attraction cards. Therapy doesn’t attract a girl, but it could make you her friend. If you notice, many good looking girls go for the “bad guy.” You can be sure that this guy doesn’t listen to her problems.

Mistake 2: Buying her things
Many guys seem to think that buying girls things will get her to like them. Buying a girl something, especially before you are seeing her, is a big mistake. What it shows is that you are not confident and think that you need “things” to attract her. What she wants to know is that you have confidence in yourself and that you believe your personality will attract her. I rarely spend more than $10 before I sleep with a girl, and that’s if i’m feeling really generous. You don’t need to use money as an attraction tool.

Mistake 3: Being too submissive
CONTROL – it’s a loaded word. Girls want a guy that is in control of himself, his future, his situation, and her. Girls don’t want to be able to controlyou. “The last thing that I want is a guy that I can control. A guy that I can control doesn’t have a chance with me.” This is one of the most common statements that I hear. The key to attracting a good-looking girl is to be different than the other 99% of guys. If you are the same as everyone else, why would she want you? She wants a guy that challenges her and doesn’t show too much interest. Guys often think, “If we don’t do what she wants, then she wont like me!” In reality, doing what she wants shows her that you are not boyfriend material – you are just like everyone else.

Learn more about what pitfalls you need to avoid if you want to be successful with college women. Pick up a copy of the College Guide To Dating right NOW.

 

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Make Her Chase You

You are the PRIZE - let HER know it!

According to David DeAngelo, the combination of COCKY and FUNNY is the key to a girl’s heart. A good portion of my “Game” stems from this principle. I position myself as the PRIZE of the interaction (COCKY) and communicate it to her in a humorous way (FUNNY). This is what we call ROLE-REVERSAL. It works great. Women are just not used to this type of behavior. They are used to guys drooling all over them.

Let me clarify.

As you date a number of girls, you may find that once you get the girl, she simply isn’t as exciting as the process of attaining her. However, the girl can prevent this from happening by playing “hard-to-get” and making me chase her. Women feel the same way - they love the THRILL of the chase. If SHE IS CHASING YOU, you can bet that she will APPRECIATE YOU and be attracted to you on a DEEPER level.

If I am interacting with a girl and she happens to make any remark about a bed or about going home, I will reply with, “WOW, I just met you and you are already trying to get me to sleep with you!” Or if she gives you a compliment, you should respond, “Listen missy, I don’t know what kinds of guys you are used to dating, but complimenting me isn’t going to get me into bed with you. You should buy me dinner instead.” HAHA. Act like she is trying to pick YOU up. Have fun with it and you will see the results.

Here’s an example of ROLE-REVERSAL. My friend Michael was IMing a girl he met a week earlier at a bar.

_____________________
(Michael) Birolalk50: Hey what’s up?

(Neta) NhcXx21: Hey, I didn’t expect to see you at the club on Thursday

Birolalk50: Me neither, I was thinking: “Did she follow me here?”

NhcXx21: Yeah that’s exactly what happened ☺

Birolalk50: i dont blame u

Birolalk50: ;-)

NhcXx21: how could you

NhcXx21: ;-)

NhcXx21: Ill try to resist following you around next weekend

Birolalk50: Ya, with me all you’ve been doing is trying to resist but I don’t know how long you can manage

NhcXx21: I’ll try my best!
_____________________

The College Guide To Dating will teach you how to FRAME the INTERACTION so that YOU are the PRIZE, and she is winning YOU over. This is a very powerful attraction tool and is necessary in EVERY set. If a woman feels that she has already won you over, she will lose attraction for you almost instantly.

 

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You Dudes Are Like MORPHEUS!

“You dudes are like Morpheus {from the Matrix}!”

Thats what my friend said to ME, when I showed him the results that some of my students acheived.

He said, “its like you offer these guys the RED PILL….and its up to them to take it!”

WOW. He’s absolutely RIGHT.

In this life, it really RED or BLUE.

If you get deeper into “Matrix Philosophy”, you will find that “The question is asking us whether reality, truth, is worth pursuing. The blue pill will leave us as we are, in a life consisting of habit, of things we believe we know. We are comfortable, we do not need truth to live. The blue pill symbolizes going to class every day, spending the weekends alone, brushing your teeth.”

The red pill is a life of knowing how to meet women.You’ll have the ability to change your life, to break your routine, and to finally be happy. It will be an emotional journey, filled with successes and great stories.

NOW I ask YOU!

You have made it this far.

Invest in yourself.

Purchase the College Guide to Dating.

As Morpheus said “Remember, all I’m offering is the truth. Nothing more.”

Actually…I offer A LOT MORE THAN THE TRUTH!

 

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